THE DANGERS OF AUTOMOBILES

Did you know . . .

. . . automobiles are used in 100% of the drive-by shootings in America according to the FBI;

. . . there is NO state-mandated waiting period to purchase an automobile and that you may purchase AS MANY automobiles as you wish in any month;

. . . importation of "assault" sports cars IS STILL LEGAL IN THIS COUNTRY?  These assault cars usually have engine capacity in excess of 6 cylinders and are capable of speeds of 120 MPH (or more) and serve no useful driving purpose;

. . . there is no restrictions on owning fully automatic transmissions. . ?!  These transmissions are the preferred gear shifting method of criminal and gangsters everywhere;

. . . there is no criminal background check before purchasing a car?  You can go into any sleazy car dealers and purchase a snub-nose "Saturday Night Special" Sub-Compact Economy car on nothing more than a signature, if you have the money.

     The Bloodshed Must Stop!  Take Back Our Streets!  No more will we sit idly by as our young people crash into one another and kill each other with depraved indifference to human life.  Not one more innocent bystanders shall be mowed down by out-of-control drivers who "snap!"

Now there is a group dedicated to controlling and eventually banning the automobile:

AUTOMOBILE CONTROL, INC.

Their goals are straightforward:

  • A national seven day waiting period before a car may be delivered after purchase
  • Total bans on all "assault" sports cars
  • Total bans on all snub-nose "Saturday Night Special" sub-compact cars
  • Eventually, a total ban on all automobiles

Their spokesperson is Sarah Brainless;

     Sarah says, "You may know my husband, Jim Brainless.  During the attempted assassination of the President, Jim was hit in the head by an out-of-control car . . . and (sniff) . . . well, he's (sniff) never been the same since . . . (sniff, sniff, HONNNNK).  So I dedicated the rest of my life to banning this evil object, the automobile.  I know that there are a bunch of groups who will fight back against my effort, such as the AAA.  These wackos would like to see a car in every garage . . . and so would those Merchants of Death themselves, the Big Three car makers.  As you know, the AAA claims that there is a constitutional right to travel.  Well, I dispute that - if you read the whole amendment like WE do, it is clear that the founding fathers only intended that ORGANIZED MILITIA may be allowed to travel . . . it is NOT to be constructed as an individual's right to travel!!!

If you join Automobile Control, Inc.
you will be sent the following:

  • A really neat pin showing a car with a red line through it
  • A fact sheet that dispels the myths of those who would argue for the owning of cars
  • A subscription to "One Cylinder Short," the magazine that reflects the goals of ACI
  • A really boffo bumper sticker that says "This car should be banned!"

Join today - don’t let these dangerous automobiles ruin our children!

(Credit to some very clever anonymous internet source -
makes just as much sense as the other things they're trying to do.)